You Do You
Sometimes I feel a lot of guilt over how much TV Kenzie watches. For the last few years when we have friends over, there’s a lot of commotion and noise and people and all those things can be overwhelming for a kiddo with special needs. So we would put on a favorite show and give her the time she needed to adjust, and after a while Kenzie would join the group.
Lately, she loves P!NK music videos. Like, a LOT. More than she did last year, and I was feeling guilt around her wanting to see them after daycare each day.
Until I started to really break it down and see what was going on.
For a parent of a child with special needs, we understand as a community that anything goes in the coping/communicating realm. Your child needs to eat fruit loops to have a conversation? Cool. Your kid needs to wear a Superman costume to feel OK with daycare drop off? Go for it. Your little one needs to wind down from a day of learning with the same song every single afternoon? Sounds about right.
If you have a child who needs help with regulating (calming themselves and adjusting to new environments) then you probably get what I’m saying. If you don’t... this is something for you back pocket. Each day Kenzie asks for the same music video. Every. Single. Day.
Repetition works for her.
Why? Because familiar feels good. It feels safe.
When Kenzie hears a tune she knows, or sees a character she recognizes she lights up, she UNDERSTANDS. Sher knows the story and the ending is guaranteed. There is no guessing, there is only comfort. And the result is that she is more open to what’s going on and more willing to learn.
Hearing the same song regulates her.
Watching a music video she knows when the room is noisy and different - regulates her.
The most amazing thing I’ve realized, is that Kenzie found and taught US this regulation.
So. P!NK music videos and Angela’s Christmas happen daily over here, and I’m letting my worry-over-what-other-people-think slide off my back, knowing that I’m doing what needs to happen in order for my kiddo to learn. Kenzie is her most willing to explore when P!NK is singing to her, so that’s what we do.
Yup, It looks different from what you do, but this mama knows what’s best for her kid.